Resistance

One of the curiosities of life is when we come across something that peaks our interest, or can even create a sense of excitement - and then within sometimes minutes there begins waves of doubt, concern even resistance. And that initial response totally disappears. It’s many things however the dominant thing is that this is totally normal.

Think of another time when you’ve come across an opportunity to expand your senses or experiences. And did you not then also have waves of thoughts of doubt, concern or potential hazards? Brene Brown’s research has shown that it’s almost a prerequisite for success. From that doubt and vulnerability is born courage and bravery to move forward; to take the next step.

What fascinates me, is that despite the awareness of mental and emotional health, and the toll it continues to take on society. The resistance to an individual exploring and learning about methods, tools, or understanding of themselves is extraordinary. We can seem to more easily overcome the doubt and resistance when there’s an acceptance by society that it’s deemed normal. For example, a new job or a move to another town or country. However as there has long been a stigma, a collective misunderstanding, with emotional and mental health, it seems to present a bigger obstacle, a deep-seated misidentification of being less of a human, or of even being weak.

Mental health is a vast field where there is no one fix-all. Like physical challenges, there are many modalities to explore - which are acceptable to trial, whether it physical therapy or Bowen therapy. Acupuncture or chiropractor. The options are encouraged and collectively accepted - understanding that it’s not always so easy either.

Again, though it seems when we are given the opportunity to explore more about understanding our thoughts, and our feelings - the resistance appears to somehow get a direct boost from the collective shame associated with our mind's abilities to navigate how we feel.

Somehow that is always the bridesmaid to the mind's ability to think, a human's ability to navigate a mathematical problem is valued way more than their ability to metabolize their feelings. And part of it is the misperception that we are to problem-solve our feelings like we problem solve an equation.

In the past, society has not been taught how to recognize our feelings and thoughts as part of our experience, usually because from those thoughts and feelings a behavior or action results, that the immediate world around us deems as right or wrong. Acceptable or unacceptable. That feedback from a very young age then shapes how we perhaps stifle or override our thoughts and feelings as untrustworthy. So we learn to seek outside of ourselves the appropriate choices and decisions to be acceptable and right.

Meanwhile, our unique thoughts and feelings continue to come like waves in the ocean. They don’t suddenly cease... so we then develop ways of distracting ourselves from them. And judging ourselves in the harshest of ways that ironically, no one else can seem to do a better job of.

So again, why do we resist so hard, the opportunity to explore further our thoughts and feelings if for no other reason than to understand them better?

Once you come across something that has piqued your interest, observe how quickly the reasons not to do it will appear. Usually, it will be one or a combination of time, money, fear, or shame.

We can wait until enough of others, willingly and vocally connect with their emotions and thoughts enough for society to shift its perception of it. Or we as a self-honoring, intuitively trustworthy compass for our own wellbeing, begin saying Yes today and follow your gut instincts in exploring that which is a very important part of who you are.

Society places a higher value on the academic qualifications of an individual and there’s a growing momentum to challenge that concept as to how much it serves today’s world?

I would like to pioneer more value of an individual’s ability to honor what they think and feel with compassionate understanding, curious alignment with their truth, and totally free of judgment and shame. If we can better navigate our internal experiences, the natural byproduct is how we then navigate that which is outside of us. Not the other way around as it stands today. And this is the invitation being presented to all of us by the worlds developing challenges. How can we continue to value that which is outside of us, greater than what lays within us?

Technology is accelerating our stimulus senses exponentially, however, the humans' ability to navigate it all has been seemingly ignored or expected to just magically happen? Is there an app available to download that perhaps? It makes me think of the movie The Matrix, where a portal exists at the base of the skull to connect to an electronic means to upload a program to the mind to have an instant understanding of a subject. Maybe it’s a precursor to our future, society will invest more in developing a reality like that, than introducing the opportunities that exist today. To introduce coping skills and understanding of one‘s thoughts and feelings as not only normal but necessary to the evolution of a different future than ones being promoted.

So next time you come across something that piques your curiosity, trust it, challenge the thoughts around the resistance as they will undoubtedly present themselves, and ask if they are really true? Or is it perhaps the evidence of generations of collective shame associated with mental health and the excuses are a part of that. Maybe we can rename this movement, rather than mental health, we can refer to it as mind management. A course in metabolizing our mental thoughts and feelings using our body, our intuition, and our heart.

We misinterpret the resistance as a sign to not do it. Where does that come from and what makes that more trustworthy than the initial thoughts? How do you navigate that? Be shit-scared and do it anyway? Or be shit-scared and stay ‘safe’.

- Meg Black